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Random **** that's on my mind right now. It's past 3 AM, so anything I say is subject to incoherency and/or ridiculousness.

1. Misconceptions of Bipolar Disorder.
First of all, Bipolar Disorder is not a disorder where a person has rapid mood swings. Bipolar disorder is characterized by periods of "mania" and "depression." These periods can last for anywhere from a few days (in which it would be considered "hypomania") up to months at a time. Hypomania is ****ing wonderful because you barely need any sleep and you aren't tired. The only problem is that sometimes your roommates fall asleep before you do and you get massively bored until they wake up.

2. I have no sense of decorum.
I forgot how to behave in public, or rather, the older I've gotten, the more nihilstic I've gotten and the less I've simply given a **** about things. Perhaps nihilistic isn't the right word since I'm much closer to Albert Camus in philosophical regard, but the point is that life is too utterly meaningless for me to practice proper decorum. I no longer see the point in it. Making fun of everything in sight is pretty much my only way of dealing with things.

3. Look! I'm being self aware!
I'm so self aware that I've become self aware of my self awareness. It gets to the point where I'll start being self aware about some massive flaw I see in myself and then I'll think to myself, "Gee, look you're being self aware again. Who do you think you're fooling?" Then I realize that no one is listening to the thoughts that I'm not saying out loud and that I am, in fact, not fooling anyone. My only question: does this make me post-post-modern? Self-awareness and "lampshade hanging" is getting to the point where you can make any crappy art and get away with it just because the work self aware that it's crap.

4. Single
I've decided to stay single for evar. Why? Because my self-awareness (see #3) has told me many times that my brain turns into complete bird**** when I "fall in love," as they say. So why not just have short term relationships and one night stands for the rest of my life? Because I'll contract a venereal disease and die and my family will all have to commit seppuku in shame? Meh. I'm used to being independent. The idea of being attached or ridiculously close to another human being is uncomfortable. I've been there before. Like, there was this girl who I was involved with like 2 1/2 years ago, though we were never like, officially dating or whatever. The point is, we were doing everything that couples do even though we weren't "like officially dating or whatever" and when we started to drift apart and argue and spend less time together it felt like something was... missing. I don't need that ****. I can be 100% of a person on my own. No need to depend on others for my happiness.

5. Marijuana vs. Tobacco & Alcohol
I never use any of these three due to the fact that I have massive health problems, but I was reading an interesting study by the British government, no less, on the effects of different drugs. They ranked them based on physical damage to a person's body, likelihood of addiction, and social harm. Alcohol was ranked worst in all three categories, and tobacco was ranked worse than marijuana in both physical damage and likelihood of addiction. So why again is marijuana illegal and tobacco and alcohol are legal? Because it smells like flaming cat piss?

6. Humans are stupid animals
We need to lower the population before there are so many people that there's no more of anything else, because the land will all be filled and people will start getting pushed into the oceans and ****, yo. I think every country should enact a "one child" rule like China did. And people have the nerve to be anti-abortion. But honestly, I'm neither pro-choice nor pro-life. I'm anti-life and anti-choice. All babies should be aborted and you have no choice in the matter.

7. I am a John Lennon wannabe
I am also the nine billionth John Lennon wannabe. Oh, how great it is. In a few years I get to break up with my band because stupid Paul doesn't like my Japanese conceptual artist wife. So we'll have a bed-in and sing a very vague but catchy song about peace and how you should give it a chance.

That is all. For now.

P.S.: Strawberry Fields Forever!

Not making fun of you or anything, I just find that sentence hilarious

Bomby Lava wrote:All babies should be aborted and you have no choice in the matter.

You get a thank because this is the funniest thing I've read all day. :lol:

I'm somewhat self-aware too.
I'd say that I've been caring about world issues less recently, but that might just be me being a generic rebellious and edgy teenager. Hmm yes, very interesting.

Humor is intended in 97% of everything I say. The other 3% isn't worth listening to. Most of the other 97% isn't worth it, either.

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Gay Atheist Liberals

Gay Atheist Liberals who?

Gay Atheist Liberals, we're here to abort your baby.

More women for me then ;)


(jk)

Hands of some of em are mine!

You're going to marry a Japanese conceptual artist just to blow off your friends before telling her how you don't want a relationship with her or children, regardless of her wishes? Sounds a bit rude, but more importantly, sounds like a very busy day; good thing you'll be sober to focus on the task & hypomaniacal for the necessary energy.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Don't worry, Capt. I was already pretty self-aware of that hardship I'd have to endure.

I was having a hard time working that one in.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Ace Mercury here.

CaptHayfever wrote:I was having a hard time working that one in.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

That's what she said.

Imagine all the sheeple.

Bomby von Bombsville wrote:the land will all be filled and people will start getting pushed into the oceans and ****, yo

*would pay to see*

8. Transience
Wouldn't it be great if we always access to times and places in our lives that we adored? To still be around people we never see anymore? To be able to go back to the way things were and tell them new things, and hang out in places you used to hang out? But life isn't like that. I'm an incredibly nostalgic person at this moment, and the sullenness is getting overwhelming. I'm about to be moving out of my apartment on Saturday, for one thing, and though I'm sure I'll see my current roommates (who I won't be living with) more over the next year, there are other crowds of people who I wasn't close to but feel saddened that I probably won't be seeing them anymore. And the nostalgia reaches back. All things must end, and sometimes things that have been over for years come back and strike you down when you least expect it. Or hit you harder than you expect when you do expect it. I miss deceased family and friends, living people who I've lost touch with, places that no longer exist; at least how I remember them. I miss the community of the dorms. I miss my old shrink. I miss that girl who used to live down the hall from me. It's all coming back to me at one moment. How easy life would be if we never formed attachments to all the impermanent moments, the impermanent bonds, the impermanent people... this transience is the saddest and most real experience of being human. I really don't know what else to say right now. My life will reach a new homeostasis for a while, hopefully a better one, I'll get back to living in the present for a while, and my memories will be happy memories, not the extreme sullenness I'm feeling right now. Things will change, people will move on, I'll move on. Some I'll see again, some I'll lose touch with. I'll manage, but there will always be these occasional moments where it crushes me inside.

And if things never changed, we'd wish they did. I'm not speaking in favor of transience, I am saying we are always doomed to want the opposite things.

^^ I understand that completely. When my older sister moved out to go to college and announced she wouldn't be returning for the summer, I had to realize that the stage in our lives when we were always together, gaming together, caterwauling together, inside joking together, etc were over and she had her own life. It made me really nostalgic and depressed, but now I'm used to the prospect and I know that I'll see her again from time to time and we will have epic times of hangoutage when I do see her.

So yeah, moving on can be really tough, but it has to be done cuz things have to change. But I totally get where you're coming from.

Kil'jaeden wrote:And if things never changed, we'd wish they did. I'm not speaking in favor of transience, I am saying we are always doomed to want the opposite things.

This is also very, ridiculously true.

I spent about six hours this morning in mental hell, and finally I decided to get it together. Congratulations, Shinji!

This kind of thing is why I think being a bit selfish is good for you. You really can't depend on other people; they go and do their own things and don't care a bit about what you feel about it, so why bother yourself about it?

Well, I think a lot of people do care about how you feel about it, but ultimately there are certain things in life that are going to be unpleasant. I mean, it would be great if we could all go through life without hurting other people, but trying specifically to avoid hurting others would lead to ultimate self-destruction. Believe me, I've tried it.

The hedgehog's dilemma - we want to be close to one another, but the closer we get, the more likely we are to hurt one another. But desiring that closeness can hurt just as much.

9. Artsy People
Listen, I love my friends. All of them. I wouldn't trade them for the world. The thing is, somehow, I managed to fall in with a relatively non-artsy crowd. I mean, my friends are interested in watching movies and listening to music, and things of that nature, but I feel like very few of my friends are interested in making movies and music, and even less of them are into exploring the more avant-garde possibilities. Really, I'd like to meet more artsy people. I mean, I know I can meat artsy people on the internet really easily, but I'd really like more artsy friends in the IRL, yo. People I meet over the internet can't really act in my films, and while collaborating on music is possible, it's really missing the energy of people in the same room, turning an idea into something real.