Page 1 of 1

Huh, this is hard to say...

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 6:13 pm
by DarkZero
I'm attracted to children. All of my sexual fantasies are of children between the ages of 5 and 11, usually girls. I realized this years ago in junior high, and to my knowledge, I've never been sexually violated as a child.

I've come to terms with my paraphilia, and I believe myself to be beyond the realm of help. As much as I'd want to have a socially-accepted orientation, it just doesn't seem to be the case.

To those who already know, thank you for being so understanding.

I'll let you read up on this. I hope none of you think any less of me.

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 6:59 pm
by Jailbreaker
I have the urge to direct you toward some people I know.

Huh, this is hard to respond to.

Luigiman's bi, Dizzy's a pedo, what's next? I think Valigarmander once admitted to being quad (guys, girls, sheep, and more sheep), but then, he's Val...

Also, I can't help but laugh at this part of the article:
Pedophilic (and hebephilic) men have lower IQs, poorer scores on memory tests, greater rates of non-right-handedness, greater rates of school grade failure over and above the IQ differences, lesser physical height, greater probability of having suffered childhood head injuries resulting in unconsciousness...
I wonder how many of these you are. Jus' kiddin'.

And, is pedophilia itself illegal? Or just pedophillic behavior?

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 7:26 pm
by Deku Tree
That's quite a burden. I've got some unusual kinks I'm not sure I could do anything about, but they're harmless so I haven't really tried. If there's nothing to be done about the attraction, just be vigilant in resisting the temptation to act on it. My sisters and my mom were sexually abused as children, and I don't know that they've ever entirely gotten over it.

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 7:28 pm
by Valigarmander
If this is all true, and you really think you might be attracted to children, I think you should go talk to a therapist or a psychologist about it. It's not going to be an easy thing to bring up, but if you're suspicious then you should see if there's anything that can be done about it before it develops into something serious.

I don't think there's much else I can say, but I hope the best for you.

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 9:16 pm
by Saria Dragon of the Rain Wilds
"Help" is a strange realm, one which I think you're not addressing fully. From my perspective, you're clearly not beyond help. I believe you simply must acknowledge that fantasy is just that. Fantasy. You have all the responsibility to make sure it stays fantasy. Finding arousal in something doesn't mean you have to do it, or even ever want it to become reality. That's why you play it out in your head.

You would be surprised how many women are aroused by rape fantasies. That, obviously, doesn't mean they ever want to be raped.

I would strongly and very sincerely recommend you speak to a professional, whether it be a therapist or a psychologist or even just your family doctor. Like I said, just because you're aroused by something doesn't mean it's going to be a real-life issue. But you need someone available that you can speak to who can be supportive and help you understand what these fantasies really are to you.

Just keep in mind that perfectly "normal" people have strange ideas all the time. The difference is whether you see your desires as inappropriate and can be resolute in never acting them out inappropriately. If you find an adult partner who's willing, you can roleplay. You don't have to see yourself as confined in your own head, just as long as you deal with it constructively.

You really can drive yourself a bit mad if you keep things like this all bottled up. Please speak to a trained practitioner.

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 10:24 pm
by Apiary Tazy
Huh. This is quite sudden.

I have to wonder why you're being so open towards this, on an internet forum no less. Honestly, if it's a problem to you, then go do what Val said. Though, I recommend you think twice before the doctor gives you any form of treatment. Just to be safe I'm sure.

I don't really mind it all that much. It's not like you really need me butting into your problems, eh?

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 10:35 pm
by Rainbow Dash
the only advice i can give is never join SA

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 10:59 pm
by CaptHayfever
Eesh Squeesh wrote:And, is pedophilia itself illegal? Or just pedophillic behavior?
Just the behavior. A neurological condition can't be illegal.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Posted: Fri Jul 23, 2010 11:21 pm
by Blake
I feel like I'm echoing what others are saying, but sexual fantasies are not uncommon and range from many unusual things. I have one myself, however I would have to ask my (future) partner(s) if she/they would be willing to go along with it.

At least you are aware of your situation though. Personally I think if you can control your situation you should be alright. However if it ever escalates please do take initiative and seek help to keep yourself and others safe before it's too late.

Posted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 12:02 am
by Ace Mercury
That specific desire pretty much spells a death kiss for your reputation once it gets out (as I'm sure you're painfully aware). It's right up there with calling yourself atheist in the deep South or yelling "I HAVE A BOMB" at an airport. It wouldn't surprise me if someone hijacked your account just to ruin your reputation, so I think we should open mind about whether you're actually admitting this.

Anyways, you seem like a smart enough chap. As long as you know that children cannot make informed consent, and that informed consent is essential, it should be cool.

Posted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 12:56 am
by Deepfake
This isn't unusual. Being a sexually repressed teenager can drive a person to find attraction in anything a person could potentially mate with. You just have to be aware that there are ramifications for obsessing over something like this. You will inevitably live in the fear that you cannot act on your impulses, etc, and that's not a good way to live.

Closing your mind to the possibility that you can change yourself by not fixating on your guilt and your frustration is the worst thing you can really do for yourself. Happiness doesn't have to come through one channel. Staying open-minded will benefit you most, here - you can change and you can live a happy life.

Posted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 10:44 pm
by Greenmarioman
^^ Naw, it's true.

I can only mirror what everyone else said. All the good advice has been given out already. :(

And I like how most of you are implying you have weird fetishes also. :3

Posted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 11:51 pm
by DarkZero
Hooray for intelligent feedback. :highfive:

Thank you for being here to listen.

Posted: Sun Jul 25, 2010 7:42 am
by Jailbreaker
Well, think of us as your big family of text walls.
Saria Dragon of the Rain Wilds wrote:Just keep in mind that perfectly "normal" people have strange ideas all the time.
I'm only afraid of heights because I have the constant urge to jump off them. If I didn't, I'd be fine.

Posted: Sun Jul 25, 2010 8:56 pm
by spooky scary bearatons
Eh, dude, you're going through the phase in your life where you'd stick your penis in anything fleshy. So it's not entirely abnormal to have these fantasies. :) They'll likely pass.

Posted: Sun Jul 25, 2010 9:29 pm
by DarkZero
But here's the thing: These are the only fantasies I've had since I started having fantasies in the first place.

I doubt that it'll 'just pass'.

Posted: Sun Jul 25, 2010 10:00 pm
by MeowMan
Eesh Squeesh wrote:I'm only afraid of heights because I have the constant urge to jump off them. If I didn't, I'd be fine.
I'm the same way with that.


It looks like more people here need a therapist than I thought.


Wait. This is VGF.. What the heck am I talking about?

Posted: Sun Jul 25, 2010 10:06 pm
by Rubber Band Man
LASER BEAR ASSAULT UNIT wrote:Eh, dude, you're going through the phase in your life where you'd stick your penis in anything fleshy. So it's not entirely abnormal to have these fantasies. :) They'll likely pass.
BAM.

Goodnight.

But seriously, if you think it's a problem, talk to someone who can help you, no offense to anyone here, but I don't think any of us have any professional background in it.

Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 8:06 am
by Deepfake
DarkZero wrote:But here's the thing: These are the only fantasies I've had since I started having fantasies in the first place.

I doubt that it'll 'just pass'.
And it took me 10 years past puberty to give a damn about breasts. Tastes change if you let them. It most likely has to do with confidence issues, etc. It's easy to fetishize the idea of being a girl's corrupter, etc, and that age gap that gives you the feeling can follow you into your later years where what you really want is to be dominant in a relationship, and right now I'd guess you don't feel that way with women your age. That's typical, 16 year old girls can be pushy and self-centered, and aren't really thinking with their heads yet - same as the males. If you just focus on the part that they're kids, though, that'll be the part that stays. Use your head, this isn't precisely what you want. There's always more than one facet to these things.

Posted: Mon Jul 26, 2010 5:31 pm
by Rubber Band Man
FALCON PAUNCH wrote:same as the males.
Oh the males are thinking with their heads alright......