Storytime on religion and the q-word

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#41

Post by Wicked Witch of the Crest » Tue Nov 12, 2013 4:59 am

Well, you are named CuccoLady.

Digging chicks makes sense. :p

But seriously, thanks for sharing that.

I'm bisexual myself. I don't have any specific side I lean on it. It's random. Sometimes I feel like hetero, sometimes like homosexual. I do do cybersex, so naturally it's whatever I feel like at the time. It helps because I don't have to adhere to my physical sex whatsoever during this.
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#42

Post by DarkZero » Tue Nov 12, 2013 5:30 am

I'm glad you don't worry about labels much because I do and that stuff can keep you up at night
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#43

Post by Apollo the Just » Tue Nov 12, 2013 5:37 am

the reason i dont now is because i used to and it caused much pain and was generally no bueno

But coming to the point where I could not care about labels was a journey in itself, haha. I personally wanted to be a special snowflake and as such wanted to be able to call myself something. It wasn't until I started thinking of my sexuality as a part of me that I finally understood, rather than A THING THAT DEFINES WHAT I AM AND THAT MAKES ME SUPER DUPER SPESHUL SO I NEED TO KNOW EXACTLY WHAT IT IS, that I was able to kind of chill and be like "yo, that person is hot and so is that other person" and take it as it comes. It was just a gradual shift in priorities that came alongside shifting to an environment that is so q-word accepting that being q-word didn't make me a special snowflake anymore, so I didn't care so much about having a name to call it.

Just my personal experiences, though. Having a label definitely made me more comfortable in HS, even though the label changed and I never knew for sure what it was. It kinda gave me something to hold on to. It was a weird security thing that I don't need anymore in my current situation.

TLDR IF LABELS MAKES U FEEL GOOD USE THEM but i understand that they can also be a biatcch when they just don't quite feel *right*
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#44

Post by I REALLY HATE POKEMON! » Tue Nov 12, 2013 9:23 pm

Saria Dragon of the Rain Wilds wrote:No, really, you're just thinking of it weirdly. To you, it is so absolutely natural and normal to make remarks about your sexuality in contexts such as the examples I gave that you don't even realise that it's the same as non-hetero-normatives making their sexuality obvious too. Same thing. You just don't notice.
Weirdly, how? Not being obtuse, I just really don't even know how you see that.

Making an off-hand remark and making an announcement are two different things. One is subtle and without intent, the other is not. Saying a particular actress is pretty is not even remotely comparable to how many non-straights will declare their sexuality loudly and clearly, publically either in person or online. There are no similarity, neither in action nor intent. I see where you guys are going, so hopefully I clarified this.

Btw, it was a simple, genuine question so hopefully this doesn't go the traditional way.

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#45

Post by heh » Tue Nov 12, 2013 10:20 pm

straight people don't need to declare their sexuality because they are the majority and are assumed to be the default and don't suffer violence for being straight

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#46

Post by The Missing Link » Wed Nov 13, 2013 12:34 am

I REALLY HATE PHASIANIDAE! wrote:One is subtle and without intent, the other is not.
Let's use a different analogy, shall we?

It's very often the case (for me at least) that whites, blacks, Asians, and Hispanics sound very differently in the manner in which they speak. I don't really pay attention to the nuances of how whites talk because I'm surrounded by that; the sound is familiar, so it doesn't immediately sound foreign. However, practically every other people group sounds different from that normal sound band that I'm used to, and my ears perk up each time at it, and I find myself mentally dissecting the sound to figure out what sort of ethnicity of person it is speaking it. It doesn't sound like the normal, and so I'm much more sensitive to hearing it.

This is quite possibly perhaps the same sort of effect as you're experiencing. Because, let me be clear, the few homosexuals I vaguely know have not (by any means) "made announcements" or proclamations or anything of the sort about how they're gay or whatever. There are no essays or poems writ or any grandiose statements. Just simple statements of, "Oh hey, let me introduce my boyfriend so-and-so." And it makes me do a double-take... if only because it defies my expectations and then, as a result, introduces the "announcement-like tone that I believe you're hearing.
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#47

Post by I REALLY HATE POKEMON! » Wed Nov 13, 2013 1:27 am

heh wrote:straight people don't need to declare their sexuality because they are the majority and are assumed to be the default
I still don't see why anyone would feel the need to do so, which is why I wanted to get an opinion, which is why I asked someone I thought would be honest. Thanks for the point of view.

- - - Updated - - -

^ I considered that, especially considering my personal views, but the question stems from thought, not reaction. It's something I really did notice, just as an impartial observation, seperate from any influence. I'm good at keeping my views in perspective, and still being able to consider issues for what they are, regardless of my position.

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