Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny | Official Trailer

[Heroine of the Dragon]

Interested? Will you be planning to see this film?

[I REALLY HATE POKEMON!]

...Let's address the elephant in the room. Ford is absolutely ancient. The only people who appear older than him are The Cryptkeeper and Biden--and that's just because he has the advantage of CGI propping up his old bones.

You just can't take him seriously as an action star in anything remotely grounded in reality anymore. Even if they acknowledge his age in-universe and incorporate it into the story there's no getting around the necessity for him to be in big action setpieces that will seem ridiculous.

Even if they conjure up a way to craft a reasonable movie around Ford's age, there's the problem of the rest of the movie being good. Is there a good story to tell about an ancient Indy? Guess we'll see. I'm morbidly curious so I might check it out.

[Booyakasha]

...does anyone remember 'The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles'? It aired back in the nineties. You had grouchy old old old Indy going around with a cane and an eye-patch, being old and crotchety and old, as a framing device. Like, he'd go into a Baskin Robbins, and they'd be all out of rum raisin, and he'd flip his lid and start yelling about 'this dern country has been goin down the tubes ever sincet that time i helped the OSS build an atomic land torpedo that won us the Battle of Verdun a hunnert years ago', and then they'd show us that story, and then we'd cut back to ancient mummy Indy eating pistachio ice cream whilst telling fearful wide-eyed kids these horror stories about Nazi gold and biblical angels and nightmarish child-flaying cults and crap. I actually kind of love that. "Sit a minute with scary Old Man Indy, kids, I've got banking to do. Indy, you don't mind telling the kids about the time you fought the Dunwich Horror, do you?" "'Mind'? I love traumatising children!!" Good show. I want that crotchety old Indy. Reminds me of my grandpa.

They're going to really need to pull a rabbit out of the hat if they want to make up for 'Crystal Skull', man.

[Deku Tree]

Harrison Ford is a bit older than George Hall was at the time.

[Booyakasha]

...I should revisit that show. I mean, I wasn't real discerning as a kid, but I liked it. Maybe I should skip over the episodes where Indy's an annoying little kid. The first episode of the show (or at least the first episode I saw) featured kid Indy on an African safari with Teddy Roosevelt, and...I mean, of course Teddy Roosevelt steals the show from this garbagey little brat.

I consumed a lot of Indy content when I was a kid. Comics, novels, 'Fate of Atlantis'...the Dark Horse comic based on 'Fate of Atlantis'. (I feel like that comic is weirdly connected to 'Crystal Skull'. There's some weird stuff that happens at Indy's college that never appears in the game. Indy has this brick-stupid meatbrained football-player student who tackles some Nazis that are trying to...kidnap Indy, or steal Atlantean artifacts? I don't remember, it's been something like twenty-five years since I've read it. Anyway, that flippin idiot reminds me a whole lot of the Shia LeBouef character, especially with them chasing around the college campus in the movie.)